Suffering, a path through healing

Hi! So, here's the devotion and what God gave me to think about yesterday. Sorry it's a day and a few hours late, but life happens. I know it's a long read, but it is encouraging and you will be blessed!

Job suffered. His name is synonymous with suffering. He asked, "Why?" He asked, "Why me?" And he put his questions to God. He asked his questions persistently, passionately, and eloquently. He refused to take silence for an answer. He refused to take cliche's for an answer. He refused to let God off the hook. Job did not take his suffering quietly or piously. He disdained going for a second opinion to outside physicians or philosophers. Job took his stance before God, and there he protested his suffering and protested mightily.

It is not only because Job suffered that that is important to us. It is because he suffered in the same way we suffer-in the vital areas of family, personal health, and material things. Job is also important to us because he searchingly questioned and boldly protested his suffering. Indeed, he went "to the top" with his questions.

It is not suffering as such that troubles us. It is undeserved suffering. Almost all of us in our years of growing up have the experience of disobeying our parents and getting punished for it. When the discipline was connected with wrongdoing, it had a certain sense of justice to it: when we do wrong, we get punished.

One of the surprises as we get older, however is that we come to see that there is no real correlation between the amount of wrong we commit and the amount of pain we experience. An even larger surprise is that very often there is something quite the opposite: We do right and get knocked down. We do the best we are capable of doing, and just as we are reaching out to receive our reward we are hit from the blind side and sent reeling.

This is the suffering that first bewilders and then outrages us. This is the kind of suffering that bewildered and outraged Job, for Job did everything right when suddenly everything went wrong. And it is this kind of suffering to which Gob gives voice when he protests to God.

Job gives voice to his suffering so well, so accurately and honestly, that anyone who has ever suffered-which includes every last one of us-can recognize his or her personal pain in the voice of Job. Job says boldly what some us are too timid to say. He makes poetry out of what in many of us is only a tangle of confused whimpers. He shouts out to God what a lot of us mutter behind our sleeves. He refuses to accept the role as defeated victim. It is important to note though that in all of this, Job in no way curses God as his wife suggests he should do. But Job doesn't explain his suffering either. He never instructs us how to live so that we may avoid this suffering. Suffering is a mystery and Job comes to respect that mystery. this mystery is God. This is the state in which will bring a person into the presence of God in a state of worship, full of wonder, love and praise, because we have no where else to turn but to God to make sense of it all. Job states that "we take the good days, why not also take the bad days?"

The moment we find ourselves in trouble of any kind-sick in the hospital, bereaved by a friend's death, dismissed from a job or the person left standing there when the relationship is over, with the other person walking away without a care, depressed, or bewildered, people start showing up and telling us what is wrong with us and what we must do to get better. Suffers attack fixers the way roadkill attracts vultures. At first we are impressed that they bother with us and amazed at their facility of answers. They know so much! How did they get to be experts in living?

More often than not these people often use the Word of God frequently and loosely. They are full of spiritual diagnosis and prescription. It all sounds so hopeful! But then we begin to wonder, "Why is it for all their apparent compassion we feel worse instead of better after they've said their piece?"

However, in our compassion, we don't like to see people suffer. And so our instincts are aimed at preventing and alleviating suffering. No doubt that is a good impulse. But if we really want to reach out to others who are suffering, we should be careful not to be like Job's friends, not to presume that we can "fix things," get rid of them, or make them "better." We look at our suffering friends and imagine how they could have better marriages, better well-behaved children, better mental and emotional health. But when we rush in to "fix" suffering we must keep several things in mind.

First, no matter how insightful we may be, we don't really understand the full nature of our friends' problems. Second, our friends may not want our advice. Third, the ironic fact of the matter is that more often than not, people do not suffer less when they are committed to following God, but more. When these people go through suffering, their lives are often transformed, deepened, marked with beauty and holiness, in remarkable ways that could never have been anticipated before the suffering.

So, instead of continuing to focus on preventing suffering-which we simply won't be very successful at anyway-perhaps we should be entering the suffering, the mystery and look around for God. In other words we need to quit feeling sorry for people who suffer and instead look up to them, learn from them, and if they will let us, join them in protest and prayer. Pity can be nearsighted and condescending, shared suffering can be dignifying and life-changing. As I look at Job's suffering and praying and worshiping, I see that he has already blazed a trail of courage and integrity for us to follow.

But sometimes it's hard to follow Job's lead when we feel so alone in our suffering, unsure of what God wants us to do. What we must realize in those times of darkness is that the God who appeared to Job in the whirlwind is calling out to all of us. Although God may not appear to us in a vision, He makes Himself known to us in all the many ways that He describes to Job-from the macro to the micro, from the wonders of the galaxies to the little things we take for granted. He is the Creator of the unfathomable universe around us-and He is the Creator of the universe inside of us. And so we gain hope-not from the darkness of our suffering, not from pat answers in a book, but from the God who sees our suffering and shares our pain.

First we hear all the stock answers. Then we ask the questions again with variations-and hear all the answers again with variations. Over and over and over. Every time we let Job give voice to our own questions, our suffering gains in dignity and we are brought a step closer to the threshold of the voice and mystery of God. Every time we persist with Job rejecting the quick-fix ideas of the people who see us and hear us but do not understand us, we deepen our availability and openness to the revelation that comes only out of tempest. The mystery of God eclipses the darkness and the struggle. We realize that suffering calls our lives into question, not God's. The tables are turned. God-Alive is present to us. God is speaking to us. And so Job's experience is confirmed and repeated once again in our suffering and vulnerable humility.



Now, given this revelation I know there is a reason to my suffering. there is a reason God took the love of my life away to raise this baby alone. Yes, I suffer daily because of the love I have for Ryan. But, I also know that God must have something else in mind, or something even greater. Even when we follow Him and beg and plead with Him, and then get angry with Him we sometimes don't know the reason until later. Sometimes we may never know why things happen or why He takes those we love away. I must not sit and plead with God, and wait. It is not my will, but His be done in my life now!

And yes, I do accept and love all your e-mails, blog responses, encouragement, and words of wisdom. God also gave me wisdom to discern what is of Him. So, I hope that this encourages all of you in your suffering as well. Remember, I am going through this. So, it's not easy for me to write this. But I do understand what true pain and suffering really is! Love you all!